Monday, January 2, 2012

Tuesday - Its Surgery Day!

Tomorrow (Tuesday) is surgery day. I will be at the hospital about 9:15am to meet with my pastor before registering. Surgery is supposed to begin around 11:30am. A few of my closest friends will be keeping my mom company while I'm in surgery for about 3 hours. After an hour or two in Recovery, I'll be in my own room - well, my room for the next few days anyways.

All I can say that I am so glad it is finally here.

When Dr. R first told me that we would wait 4-6 weeks, I was relieved. I wasn't ready to be cut open again. And in truth, I wasn't ready for whatever the outcome would be from this procedure. I wasn't ready to deal with those first few painful days after the surgery. I wasn't ready to deal with the prospect of losing my chance to ever be pregnant. I wasn't ready to hear about how it may have spread, Stages and chemotherapy.

But today I feel ready.

I'm ready for surgery and the weeks of discomfort that I know will be on the other side. Mostly because I know that it is temporary and that within a few weeks I will be well on my way to recovery.

I'm ready to face any further treatment that may be needed head on. If chemo is necessary, then I feel confident that I can handle it. Thank you to everyone who told me about their own experience (or that of a loved one) and put it in perspective for me.

And, I know that no matter how ready I feel right now, I may not be fully prepared for what comes next.

I can't honestly say that I am alright with having a hysterectomy. I am sure that if that happens, I will grieve it for a long time. But I do feel completely at peace knowing that it will only be done if really necessary. So, while it will be hard, I will not have regrets.

I can't thank you all enough for all your support. I know I say it a lot, but it won't ever be enough to express how I would not be feeling nearly this confident without each and every one of you. Even if all you've done is sent an email, included a note in your Christmas card or "liked" one of my facebook statuses! Every little bit has made me feel less alone.

Thank you so much.

Once again I ask for your prayers, tomorrow more than ever.

Prayer Requests:

1. For Dr. R - that he will be confident and careful. That he will use his wisdom and experience to make the best decisions during my surgery as possible.
2. For a safe and successful surgery - that Dr. R will get as much information as he needs to make good recommendations for my future treatment.
3. That the cancer will not have spread past the cyst that has already ruptured and been removed. That no further organ removal will be necessary. And that it will remain Stage 1.
4. That I will heal and recover as quickly as last time.

Psalm 91
If you say, “The LORD is my refuge,”
and you make the Most High your dwelling,
no harm will overtake you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
“Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”
{Emphasis mine}


Your support and prayers are so important to me!